10 Self-Help Books That Changed My Life And Help Me Become A Happier Person

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WHAT'S IN THIS POST?

IN a hurry? Here are the books!

How These Books Came Into My Life

First off, let me start by saying that I never thought I would be the type of person interested in reading or listening to any type of non-fiction book of any kind, or even self-help books for that matter.

At the end of 2018, I was so mentally and emotionally overwhelmed by work, personal aspirations, and family life that I just wanted to shut down. I wanted to quit my job, shut everyone out, and just “veg out” on the couch binging on Netflix shows until I was sick of it.

Little did Hubby and I know, a couple months later we uprooted our life in Colorado to another state for the first time. Adjusting to a new environment was another life event we had to get used to on top of caring for our sick dog, who we later discovered had cancer.

Ultimately, I left the job I was dreading and the distance from my stressors gave me some breathing room. This was the first time in my life, at the age of 31, I focused on myself, my wellbeing, and our relationship as a couple.

We knew we wanted to have a family and were open to the possibility of starting one in a new state. Instead of focusing on personal family matters that I had no control over, I was able to shift my thoughts to the family Hubby and I wanted to create.

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This motivated me to take better care of my mental health and put myself first. Which was challenging as a type 2 personality and thankfully Hubby has been a strong support system along the way.

Although the distance and move made self-care easier, I listened to a lot of self-help audiobooks in my self-care journey. I learned what really mattered to me and how to let go of what I couldn’t control.

I genuinely feel that these books played a great role in who I am today and I am much happier than I used to be. I really hope these books can do the same for you or at least give you a chuckle if you’re not into self-help books but wanted to give it a try anyways.

10 Books That Changed My Life and Made Me a Happier Person

Here are the self-help books that really stood out to me. They changed my way of thinking and how I interacted with others, which made me less stressed and happier.

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#1 Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less

Essentialism was the first self-help book I listened to and I am so glad I did. The author, Greg McKeown does the audio and he did a great job of getting to the point and providing examples along the way.

I felt like this book was written for me because I always said yes to everyone who asked for my help. I was constantly overworked in my job and emotionally overwhelmed in my personal life. If I didn’t take on the projects or carry the burden of others, I felt guilt and shame.

If you are looking for a new way to do more with less, set boundaries, and find what’s essential in your work and personal life, Essentialism is a must read. It’s no wonder it has over 70k positive ratings on goodreads.

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#2 Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear

Written in 2015 by Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic is still getting lots of reviews on goodreads and Amazon. When I was reading this book, I was going through a transformative phase of starting a new career path.

I was afraid of the failures I would face and embarrassment that would come from it. Big Magic was just what I needed at the time and gave me the encouragement I needed to move forward with whatever I wanted in my life.

Gilbert shares her own personal journey in her creative process and gives tips and advice on how to embrace the creativity in your life.

Big Magic is a great book to read if you’re struggling with harnessing your own creativity and talks about how it can play a huge role in your career and personal life. I have recommended this so many times to my friends who have felt stuck pursuing the next chapter of their life.

She does have a little bit of that “woo woo language,” but hey, it’s called “Big Magic” for a reason.

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#3 The Tools: Transform your Problems into Courage, Confidence, and Creativity

The Tools was one of the books that I found myself bookmarking every few pages to relisten in the audio. The authors Barry Michels and Phil Stutz are both behavioral therapists that share patient experiences and stories and how they’ve helped them move past their struggles.

I really enjoyed listening to the audio version of this book because the patients were narrated with different voices. So if you are deciding between book or audio, go with the audio.

The authors offer techniques and ways of thinking, communicating, and acting towards negative feelings, interactions, and thoughts. The Tools along with many self-help books in general also has a “woo wooness” to it but also a dark side as well, If you can overlook those parts (if they bug you), I think it has a lot of useful information.

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#4 The Four Tendencies: The Indispensable Personality Profiles that Reveal How to Make your Life Better (and Other People’s Lives Better, Too)

We have four for four! In my personal growth of letting go, The Four Tendencies gave me a different perspective on how people respond to expectations and how to reduce conflict. Gretchen Rubin, breaks down the four personality types and what drives their behavior and actions.

There have been mixed reviews on Rubin’s credentials in this area of social psychology; however, I felt that the information I gained from the book still gave me something to think about. If you’re interested in learning who you are in The Four Tendencies (Upholder, Questioner, Obliger, or Rebel) you can take her free quiz, here.

I included The Four Tendencies on my list because it made me think about my family relationships and how I could communicate with them better by understanding the drivers behind their actions and responses. If you’re into learning about personalities like I am, I think it’s worth the quick read.

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#5 The Road Back to You: An Enneagram Journey to Self-Discovery

The Road Back to You (written by Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stabile) is actually a book I read a couple months ago when I was going through a depressive funk. I even wrote a post called 5 Things That Happen When You’re in a Funk & Ways to Bounce Back, if you’re interested.

I first learned about enneagrams in 2019 from a friend and it was the only personality typing that I wanted to learn more about. Earlier I mentioned I am a Type 2 (The Giver) and what I appreciated about The Road Back to You is how the authors broke down each enneagram type.

They provided characteristics of each type, what their childhood may have looked like, what their work and personal relationships are like, what each personality type can do to become a healthier and better version of themselves, and what an unhealthy version looks like . What I really appreciate about enneagrams in general is that your type can change depending on where you are in life.

This whole post is all about living a happier life and The Road Back to You might be an introduction to how you can get there!

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#6 Girl, Wash Your Face

I’ll be honest, I never knew or heard of Rachel Hollis until I came upon this book. I was initially attracted to the book for its “reality check” title and was ready for some truth talk.

I listened to the audiobook read by Hollis herself, and I loved it! Listening to Girl, Wash Your Face felt like I had a friend talking to me and sharing her own personal stories to motivate me to get myself together.

She offered a no BS motivational pep-talk that I needed to move past my insecurities because she had been there too. She was walking in my shoes of unworthiness and found her way out.

If you’re struggling with your own self-confidence and embracing all that you are and need a friend by your side, check out Girl, Wash Your Face.

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#7 Girl, Stop Apologizing

If you like the no BS kind of writing and can’t get enough of Rachel Hollis, check out her other book Girl, Stop Apologizing.

I enjoyed this one as much as Girl, Wash Your Face and she was still her genuine self when she wrote this book. In Girl, Stop Apologizing, Hollis acknowledges the challenges that women face starting at a young age of childhood. How women are molded to act and think a certain way and that development has made us afraid to act differently from it.

Hollis goes into how to let go and embrace who you are to get what you want. If you’re a woman struggling to get where you want in life and need someone to push you across the finish line, read Girl, Stop Apologizing.

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#8 The Year of Less

Along the lines of Essentialism, by Greg McKeown, the author Cait Flanders shares her 12-month experiment in The Year of Less. I like to think of The Year of Less as learning how to identify the tangible things in life that are essential.

This was a fast read and Hubby and I actually listened to this in a 6-hour car ride. It provided us with great discussion and even inspired us to try to live with less as well. Considering the multiple moves we’ve done, we’ve already purged and decluttered our home many times!

But the challenge was, could we actually learn to live with less? The answer was yes. As we learned to live with what we have and shop second hand when possible to reduce landfill waste due to new consumerism, we cherished more of the intangible.

If you’re looking for ways to live with less and only the essentials and still have a fulfilled life, check out The Year of Less by Cait Flanders.

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#9 Decluttering at the Speed of Life: Winning Your Never-Ending Battle with Stuff

Along the lines of decluttering, the Marie Kondo organization phase hit hard in 2019 and although I never read her Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, I did watch her show on Netflix.

This led me down a bunny hole of purging, decluttering, and home organization that was fitting for our move across state lines. What I really appreciated about Dana White’s Decluttering at the Speed of Life was the perspective she gave on decluttering.

If you’re wondering how a decluttering book made it on my list, it was part of my personal growth in appreciating what I have and learning to let go. And sometimes letting go, meant letting go of all of the things that filled our home that would add to the mental stress of clutter.

A cluttered workspace and living space can affect how you can feel mentally and emotionally and being in a cleaner environment can take that added stress away. So if you want to start decluttering your home, but maybe it’s hard to let go of things right away, check out Decluttering at the Speed of Life.

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#10 The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning

Here’s another book to help you in your decluttering journey. Although the author, Margareta Magnusson takes a different mental approach in The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning.

The purging and decluttering process is a bit more intense as Magnusson shares her perspective as an older woman cleaning her home in preparation for her death. This might not be for everyone, but it does offer another perspective on how to purge and what to purge.

It may also give you a new perspective and appreciation for the things you own that truly matter to you.

Final Thoughts

There you have it, the books that changed my life for the better and I am so much happier because of them (and some short-term therapy). Self-help books aren’t for everyone, but I highly encourage it if you find yourself in a rut or looking for ways for personal growth.

In this post, I’ve shared the books that were thought provoking, motivational, and aided in my journey to being a happier person. There are so many other self-help books out there that may speak to you more than the ones I’ve listed.

Either way, if personal growth and happiness is what you’re seeking there’s a book, blog, podcast, etc. out there for you.

Here’s a recap of my book list:

Check out these other books to read!

If you’re looking for more self-help books to reach, check out some of these below. I personally haven’t read them yet but they’re on my list to read when I have more time.

Have you read any of these books yourself? What were you thoughts? Any that you might add to your reading list? Comment below!

Wishing you a Little Peace of Happiness in your self-growth journey!